Radio-controlled neural implant instantly turns friends, family, and unsuspecting strangers into obedient robots ready and willing to follow any command. Easily implanted using a mild local anaesthetic (not included) into the ‘free will’ center of the brain. $2,249.95

Reviews

Works as advertised. I created an army of a thousand zombies and I'm now going to storm Fort Knox with 'em, 'cause I just got my first adjustable rate mortgage bill. — Will Lander, Charlotte, NC